Playing The Victim

I got good at playing the victim. I wanted people to feel sorry for me, to pity me. It’s common for addicts to consistently play the victim even in situations that are clearly the opposite. I got so comfortable with the attention it attracted. The sad truth is I started to pity myself. I started to believe that I was the victim. My clouded judgment and insufficient emotions disabled me to realize that I am not the only person on the face of the planet. I wanted to feel justified in complaining endlessly about my unfortunate circumstances while passively registering my dissatisfaction than actively changing my situation. Sound familiar?

Feelings don’t require justification. They are automatic responses to events; good or bad, and people’s feelings cannot be judged as right or wrong. However, actions, unlike feelings, have consequences and must be considered in relation to moral issues and rational issues. Am I making sense?

As someone who played the victim role for many years, I dealt in judgements and “shoulds”. I had a sense of entitlement, I was selfish, and I was child-like. I assumed that the world should be fair. This kind of victim role led to resentment, anger, righteousness, and vengeful feelings. Worse yet, feeling victimized were bottled up inside contributing to feeling helpless and depressed.

I think it’s obvious to say playing the victim does more harm than good for everyone involved. Although this habit has been difficult to break, it is achievable. I think it comes with maturity and understanding. When I started to learn more about emotions and feelings I found learning compassion and empathy were helpful in breaking the victim role.

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3 thoughts on “Playing The Victim

  1. Well done Crystal. I’m becoming more and more impressed in the way you are expressing your truth and going through a healing process in doing so. Just keep following that truth and it will attract the same back to you. The universe knows what is in your heart and cannot but give that back to you. Keep strong, believe in you, and you will become what you believe within. Namaste

      • It is in fact when the ego finally lets go and goes to sleep. That is the closest point for you to connect to your higher self (spirit or God or whatever you are more comfortable with), and things that are needed for your understanding will be passed on to you. That is why meditation is a good thing to get into. It calms the mind, reduces stress like you wouldn’t believe AND allows more things to come into your consciousness for you. It can be quite symbolic in what it will show you and I find that it also has quite an emotional element to it as well. If you would like a bit more information, go to my site and read ‘The Dreaming’. That was my version of how I speak with spirit. Get more information and find what is comfortable for you. Glad that you are finding that lovely heart within Crystal. Now you can speak with it and understand it as well. Namaste

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