Relapse

Sometimes relapsing is just a part of addiction. Habits are generally hard to break, whatever they might be. I think instead of looking at a relapse as a defeat, maybe it’s beneficial to look at it as a chance to learn, an opportunity. I don’t think it’s worth thinking that anything less than perfect is a total failure. It just leads you to think that you don’t have the willpower. Life is full of ups and downs, good days and bad; sometimes urges and temptations can come out of no where, without any warning. Small problems that may seem insignificant at the time can slowly build and eventually or suddenly push you over the edge. For a lot of addicts it’s not always how that day might be going, but maybe it’s a matter of hours, minutes, or seconds. Everyone is different and therefore everyone will have different ways of dealing with their circumstances. For me; having realistic goals helps me, thing’s I had forgotten about while being wrapped up in addiction. I am mending broken relationships with friends and family, enjoying simple thing’s I had lost. I haven’t relapsed this time, I don’t plan on it, I don’t think anyone does. But you never know what tomorrow has in store.

I figure the real celebration isn’t always the day you quit, or even the 5, 10, or 20 year anniversary. It’s every day, every hour, every second you are sober. And every day you get back on track after a relapse.

Every moment counts.

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6 thoughts on “Relapse

  1. I would agree with the first sentence of this post that having a relapse is part of addiction. However, at the same time, maybe having a relapse is needed in order for us to try and refocus on what we need to do. I mean, getting onto an addiction is easy, but I know that breaking it is hard. Recently, I had such a bad urge to want to have a drink (I don’t know if you read my post on it ‘The Sinister Urge’), and even though I wanted a drink so badly, I resisted. My point being is that having a relapse, in one sense is a bad thing, but it’s also a good things as well, because it means that giving up just like that doesn’t work, but cutting down does. I say that from my own experience. Even though I don’t know your background or experiences from being sober, my advice is, having a relapse isn’t always a bad thing, especially if it’s only one drink that you have.

    Keep up the work you’re doing. All the best

    Matt

    • I agree with you, like I said in the post; Its beneficial to look at a relapse as a chance to learn, an opportunity. I think I made a comment on one of your posts and I believe it was “the sinister urge”, I said: “Someone once said to me the darkest hour is only sixty minutes. I don’t fully agree with this because a dark hour can turn into a day a month, so on. But I say this to you because usually with an urge, it does pass. It passes as long as you let it, and its not easy, actually honestly it sucks. But the point is every minute or even every second that passes counts. You can do it. It might not mean much coming from me, but I believe in you.” I think relapses can be good learning experiences, it lets you stop and think of why and what and when leading up to it. I have been sober for 7 months, and I haven’t relapsed this time…yet. I don’t plan on it, no one does. But shit happens sometimes. Its the longest I have been clean in 10 years. I have been addicted to a number of things, always worse the next time, read my post “Getting Clean”, it goes into it more there. Wishing you all the best!
      Crystal

  2. Relapse is part of the illness, not recovery, as I am oft to say. I think early on it is more accepted, so to speak, to lose a foothold and go back out. The key is coming back as soon as possible. For those who have been sober / recovered for a bit, relapsing has a lot of stuff going on between the picking up of the drink and the mindset before picking up the first drink. There certainly are temptations out there, and I had plenty when I first got sober. Hell, now and then I get a teeny voice telling me that it might be ok to have a drink. It gets easily pushed away. Back in the early days, that voice was not so easily pushed away. A looming feeling accompanied it, that of thought equalling reality. Which we know isn’t true. But it felt true when I had those thoughts. So the relapse is a breakdown somewhere. And like you mentioned, when someone does go back out, it’s a chance to see where we tripped. not where we landed, but where we tripped and then see what we have learned. Some take longer to learn…but as long as we continue to seek and grow and be teachable, then the lesson may come.

    Glad you posted…thank you for this.

    Love and light,
    Paul

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